How can this be?

I was born 64 years ago today. That doesn’t sound so bad.

I am, as of today, 64 years old. That sounds bad. That sounds terrible. That feels terrible. To be 64 years old, an age that at one time, I thought was old. Okay, I thought it was VERY old. That was when I was 40, maybe.

So, it sounds terrible, and it feels terrible to have to realize I am 64. But, truth is, I don’t feel terrible. I am shocked (to realize my age), but I feel quite wonderful, thank you very much.
Do I experience any of the “pains” of being 64—of “aging" – oh, yes. Many things are different today than when I was 40, some good, some so NOT. Some day I may write a book on “Aging Gracefully.” I said SOME DAY, meaning, after I figure out how to do it. In that book, I would begin with a list (a long list) of all the things that change with time. Don’t even get me started on that list, today! But that hypothetical book would need to end with how to handle those changes gracefully. Nope. Not there yet.

No, I don’t have it figured out yet—I haven’t arrived at that “place” of being content to sit and smile with all my unspoken wisdom gained by successfully conquering this aging thing. Maybe that will be the topic of my blog on May 23, 2021, when I’m 74. Maybe.

But for now, I will sit and smile as I think about these things, on the day I turn *gasp* 64:

I have 64 years worth of blessings for which to be thankful. And I am.

Thank you, Lord for:
~giving me 64 years on this earth, a place not my final home, but a place I have enjoyed visiting for this many years so far!
~giving me the understanding and the heart that allowed me, as a child, to accept the gift of salvation, offered by You through the sacrifice of your Only Son, to pay the price for my sin;
~blessing me with parents who loved me, a father who was willing to admit his weaknesses and become your servant for most of my growing-up years (oh, yes, I do thank God for allowing me to be a Preacher’s Kid!), a mother who taught me how to be a wife and mother;
~blessing me with siblings who are my best friends and who are always there for me, and with whom I love to spend time and share life;
~blessing me with the gift of music, for my own enjoyment, a gift that can never be taken away; and for allowing me to use that gift in His service for so many years;
~blessing me with the love of my life, my husband who has been my only love since I was 12 (really!) and who continues to take care of me and love me as an “aging” woman, even more than he cared for and loved me as a young (very young!) woman (that is so amazing to me!);
~blessing me with the gift of teaching, and allowing me to share that gift with so many students who have come through my life through all these years;
~blessing me with the two most wonderful children any mother could have, each with his/her own characteristics that endear them to me and make me so thankful that God allowed me to bring them into the world and “mother” them for 39 and 40 years, so far!
~blessing me with four very special grandchildren, each of whom shows me God’s greatness, each time I see them, or even think about them; being a grandmother may truly be the greatest blessing any woman can experience, and one that, by the way, requires the passage of time!
~blessing me with good health and the strength to make wise choices that have contributed to my health and well-being;
~reminding me that while I am certainly getting older, You are not finished molding and making me to be more like you; help me to be that “sweet old woman” that I desire to be…

Well, I find that my list almost has no end. I could go on and on with the list of my blessings. Now, what does that say about those 64 years? It says that they have been wonderful years. It says that if BEING 64 YEARS OLD means having had these wonderful blessings, I’ll take it. I’ll not only take it, I’ll thank God for it.

So, yes, Happy Birthday to Me. It IS a happy birthday, but all because of God and the relationship I have with his Son, Jesus.

Thank you, Lord, for my birthday, and for using it to remind me of all YOU have done for me, so undeserving.

Siblings and Friends

It's just very special when your siblings are also your best friends, and that is the case with my brother Keith, my sister Janene, and myself. The older we get, the more we treasure our times together.

Conner's Pops Concert

Among the songs that Conner participated in were "Eye of the Tiger" and "Celebration."

Alyssa's Spring Concert

Alyssa is in three select choirs in Ozark High School. At the spring concert, the Women's Choir and the Chorale (which includes all members of the Varsity Singers, her third choir) performed, and it was an incredibly awesome concert. We were pleased to be able to be there. Alyssa's family attending: Mamo and Grandad (Russell and me), Mom (Sharida), brother (Dawson), Dad (James), and Grandma (Sharon). Alyssa is very serious about her music and is thinking about majoring in music education in college (currently finishing her junior year).

Such a Blessed Mom

Dawson, Me, Sharida, Alyssa Conner, Mark, Me, ToryCards are always so special for me.

 

Yes, that’s me. Such a blessed mom. Every Mother’s Day I get to see and/or hear from both my children (and their families). This year was special because during this weekend, I was able to be with both my children and their families.

Friday night we drove to southwest Missouri to attend our granddaughter’s vocal concert (blog post/pictures coming shortly). Saturday morning we met for breakfast and some rare “visiting” time.

All Sundays are special for me, because I get to be in my son’s church and be blessed by his music and preaching. Today’s sermon made me feel especially honored as he said some wonderful things about his mom, as a part of a fantastic sermon about Super Moms in the Bible. During the message, he read the poem that my daughter wrote for me, on my 50th birthday. Tears flowed (and not just from me).

Dinner at our son’s home, to honor his wife and mom, was so fun—moms not allowed to lift a finger. How awesome is that! He grilled delicious fresh tilapia. Cardinals game topped off a special day.

Yes, I am so blessed.

Facebook Follies: Fun and Fear (an opinion piece)

     Since my blog is a safe place for ME to record MY feelings, I am going to actually “blog” my thoughts on some observations that have rather slapped me in the face recently. I do not like the conclusions I have been forced to draw, but the thought process that led me to the conclusions has been healthy and has made me realize that facebook CAN have some major “pros” as well as cons. By witnessing an extreme case in the negative, the contrast between that and “the norm” has made me realize that facebook is not “bad” for everyone. 

     However, I have seen evidence that it is indeed possibly not only bad, but dangerous, for some. I’m not talking about the “duh” cases that we all know about--the stories of marriage break-ups, stalking, libel suits, and so on. But the observation I have made is about a phenomenon much less commonly known (certainly not often discussed).

     For now, I am a facebook “user.” [See Comments.] I control my facebook with very tight settings—not just for security. I decide not only whose feeds I will see, but also, who sees mine—I even prevent some of my “friends” from seeing my posts (*gasp*) for various reasons. But only as a facebook consumer would I have been able to see what I have recently seen. In a way, I wish I had not. But in a deeper way, I am glad I know. 

     While there are some things about facebook that I do not like and believe to be inherently evil, I also believe that for some people (and maybe the majority of healthy adults) it can be a good thing—a fun and interesting way to connect with and stay connected with real-life friends and family, a place to chit-chat about the important and the non-important in a friendly environment. Here’s an example of the good: a married couple, both on facebook, with each other listed as spouse, with many mutual friends who are also real-life friends and with whom they have real relationships, have facebook up, on their computers lots of the hours they are together in their home. The fun of facebook is a part of their time spent together, and is just one of many fun things they do together. The husband and wife in that example had a healthy and normal psyche and healthy and normal interpersonal relationships BEFORE facebook, and being on facebook does not change that, and in fact may well strengthen those areas.

     I’m reminded of my husband’s take on those who came back from serving in Viet Nam “all messed up.” When asked about that, he always replies, “The ones I know about were ‘all messed up’ before they went to Viet Nam.” 

     That ties in with my conclusion:

Facebook + social maladjustment = Dangerous Volatility

     That’s the brief version—the extended version would be this: Social networking in the hands of someone who is socially maladjusted and may also have jealousy, control and anger issues is, frankly, dangerous, especially for that person. It prevents their getting better; it stands in the way of social adjustment and healing. It stands in the way of nurturing relationships and in fact may lead them to alienate those who care the most about them. I believe this applies to very few people, so I would not jump to the conclusion that facebook is bad for all, or even for most. But it is bad for a person such as one who fits the description just given.

     Further indicators of the kind of person in whose hands social networking can be a dangerous thing:

1) They have very few real-life friends. They may have hundreds of facebook “friends.”

2) Their posts are almost 100% selfish or self-centered or materialistic, and if anyone else posts something “altruistic” or (heaven forbid) “spiritual,” the maladjusted individual often has derogatory comments.

3) Their posts almost all seem to be an attempt to get others to “want” their life. They make obvious their jealousy by attempting to invoke jealousy. They may even go so far as to post photos of “things” that are not theirs (cars, motor homes, land, home construction), with no explanation as to the real owner. When someone comments on the photo (maybe “is that yours?”), there is no response.

4) It sometimes (maybe most of the time) seems that person does things, goes places, or buys things SO THAT they can post it on facebook (see #3). This is absolutely true and absolutely dangerous.

     The reason I believe it is harmful to that individual to interact in a social network environment is this: Instead of helping them adjust, it fuels their maladjustment. They “live” in the facebook world, and by definition, that is not the real world. They spend their time in a fantasy world, NOT learning how to interact with real people. They may even become confused about who they are in real-life, because they begin to see themselves as the person they have “presented” to the facebook world (someone they would much rather be). That is why that person may have fewer and fewer real-world relationships. Real-world relationships require real-life interactions, and this person finds that increasingly difficult. And so, the social networking environment becomes their life and can be caustic to real relationships. (Note: I do not believe facebook is a fantasy world for most healthy adults.)

     In their own facebook world, they are the RULER. They get to say whatever they want (don’t dare disagree in a comment that follows), make themselves appear to be whomever they want, and this is the kicker: because it is THEIR world, they get to throw out all the “rules” that socially well-adjusted people adhere to—rules like be polite, don’t be rude, respect your elders, respect others’ opinions, don’t put others down, and on and on. Of course, anyone who is on facebook has those same “rights.” But, socially well-adjusted people do not break those rules. Or if they do let a conversation get out of hand, they apologize, maybe even remove the post that they realize makes THEM look bad, rather than just going deeper and deeper into their own cycle of appearing to prove their ignorance.

     When conversations “hosted” by a socially maladjusted person get out of hand, that person doesn’t know when to stop. They keep on until every reasonable person who was a part of the conversation eventually drops it, realizing that this person is not capable of sound reasoning, or at least obviously has chosen not to use it.

     People who care about an individual like this can do their part by not contributing to the festering maladjustment. That may mean not commenting (since any comment other than a total agreement may evoke anger and rage). If you are a person like myself, who cannot keep from commenting on a post that is 100% off-base (not as a matter of opinion, but as a matter of fact), then the best course of action, for yourself, but mainly for the other individual, is to remove that person from your friend list. It is one thing to stand by and watch someone you care about self-destruct. It is another to be a part of it. This is particularly a good course of action if you also believe the other person should not see your posts (for example, if seeing good things about your life contributes to their dissatisfaction with their own). 

     Of course, the very best thing would have been not to have accepted the friend request in the first place. But, to reiterate, it was in the ongoing participation in facebook interaction that my observations have been made and conclusions drawn. 

     It is my hope that individuals such as those described here (thankfully, the exception rather than the rule) will find ways to heal. For that person, it seems crystal clear to me that non-stop facebook does not help. For that person, Facebook is a Folly, and one that should be Feared.

Beach Bash VBS Bulletin Board

Directing our church's VBS is one of my most challenging but rewarding activities. This year's theme is Beach Bash, so I put together a promotional bulletin board using my Cricut cutting machine.

Easter Afternoon

After a fantastic service at RiverOaks Church, celebrating the resurrection of Jesus, we enjoyed a traditional Easter afternoon, with dinner followed by egg-coloring and Easter baskets. Rainy weather deterred us from the usual egg hunt, and we certainly missed our daughter and her family (couldn't come because of work schedules). But it was a fun and relaxing afternoon with our "kids."

Don’t Forget to Remember

As we mature (a phrase my dermatologist is fond of using, even though I have asked him to stop beginning sentences with it), we become more aware of the importance of memory and memories. This morning my sister and I were having a conversation about the importance of exercising our minds. We agreed that one way we can do that is to discipline ourselves to remember. Rehearse the memories. Will yourself to recall; don’t just shrug it off with, “I can’t remember anything anymore.” My sister mentioned that she had presented a brief devotional on “Remembering,” a few years ago, to the staff of missionaries with whom she worked at the time. I asked for her permission to share. It follows.

Devotional from Guest Writer, Janene Ford

Don’t Forget to Remember

Since I do not live near our grandchildren, I have to rely on their memories of us, their grandparents, and what we do when we are together. I do memory enhancement exercises with them. I talk to them on the phone:

“Do you remember when we went walking in the woods and we heard the hoot owl?”

“Do you remember when we did the style show and you were a Greek goddess?”

“Do you remember when we went swimming at the hotel?”

I also send them letters and pictures. I tell them, “Don’t forget to remember…..”

Don’t forget to remember. This is not an original idea. We have been asked, over and over, in the Scriptures to remember. Remember what God has done. We are to remember the ways God has answered our prayers through the trials, remember how God comforted us in our very saddest times, how He strengthened us in our weaknesses, how he has protected us.

I want to encourage you to LOOK FOR WAYS TO REMEMBER GOD’S PAST FAITHFULNESS. Make a practice of remembering. When (not if) hard days come, we will be accustomed to remembering God’s faithfulness, His goodness, His protection, His unfailing love, and the promises He has kept. Don’t forget to remember.

Psalm 77

11 I will remember the deeds of the LORD;
       yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.

12 I will meditate on all your works
       and consider all your mighty deeds.

13 Your ways, O God, are holy.
       What god is so great as our God?

14 You are the God who performs miracles;
       you display your power among the peoples.

Psalm 78

2 I will open my mouth in parables,
       I will utter hidden things, things from of old-

3 what we have heard and known,
       what our fathers have told us.

4 We will not hide them from their children;
       we will tell the next generation
       the praiseworthy deeds of the LORD,
       his power, and the wonders he has done.

5 He decreed statutes for Jacob
       and established the law in Israel,
       which he commanded our forefathers
       to teach their children,

6 so the next generation would know them,
       even the children yet to be born,
       and they in turn would tell their children.

7 Then they would put their trust in God
       and would not forget his deeds
       but would keep his commands.

Psalm 102

18 Let this be written for a future generation,
       that a people not yet created may praise the LORD :

Don’t forget to remember!

Thanks to Janene for permission to share her writing.

Granddaughter Alyssa-Junior Prom

This is my beautiful granddaughter who lives on the other side of the state from me! Her mom took pictures and emailed them to me. Beautiful and sweet, that's Alyssa!

Our Little Sassi Girl

“Jill of All Worries—Master of None”

I’m very competitive. If I’m in a class, I like to make an A. Wait—I don’t only want an A, but I want my PERCENTAGE to be higher than anyone else’s in the class—or maybe higher than any student that professor has ever taught. You get the idea. So, it’s only natural that I strive to be the best worrier I know. That’s tongue-in-cheek, of course. But you might think it to be true if you could peek at my worry-list.

Right now I have a specific little worry. It may be solved/gone by this afternoon. It may not. But I’m focused on it this morning. It’s getting a lot of my attention so far today (and last night, and a few days before that).

But I do not DESIRE to be really good at worrying. I desire to conquer the grip that worry often has on my life. So, once again, I have opened my notebook to the passages I have read many times (and have shared with many others) with a fresh commitment to “practice what I preach” about turning over my fear and worries to God. This file is called “My Fear Passages.” It includes these passages:

When I am afraid, I will trust in You. Psalm 56:3

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. – 2 Timothy 1:7

You will keep in perfect peace Him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. – Isaiah 26:3 (NIV)

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."- Isaiah 41:10 (NIV)

…God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” So we say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?” – Hebrews 13:5b-6 (NIV)

“For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. – Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will direct your paths. - Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea. - Psalm 46:1-2 (NIV 2011)

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 4:6-7 (NIV 2011)

Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me. As for me, I call to God, and the LORD saves me. - Psalm 55:5, 16, (NIV 2011)

So, these verses have been on my heart and in my prayers. This morning, in a conversation with my sister, totally unrelated to this issue, she made a statement regarding her career direction right now. But her statement stayed in my mind after our phone conversation, as I applied it to my own state of worry. She said, “This [a direction related to her career] was not part of my master plan.” Then she quickly followed with, “…but I’M NOT THE MASTER.”

That’s what I need to remember. I pulled out this verse from my “Fear Passages” list for focus today:

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” - Isaiah 55:8-9 (NIV)

…Because I don’t really want to be the “master of worries.” I want to remember that I know and can trust the MASTER of all things in my life.

UPDATE: While typing the previous paragraph of this blog piece, I received a phone call that ends the worry about this particular issue. Thank You, Lord. Now, may I remember today’s “lesson” for the many more opportunities I will no doubt have to put it into practice.

Debut Concert

~Photos Courtesy of 323 Photography by Jen Peterson~

We were thrilled to attend the Debut Concert of Last Ones First, at RiverOaks Church. There was no admission charge, but tshirts and CDs were sold and donations were accepted for Mark and Tory's upcoming mission trip to Nicaragua. The music was wonderful, and Conner did a fantastic job with keys, percussion, and many vocal contributions.

Conner's Quartet at District Contest

This is Conner's first year to be in a school choir, so this was great experience for him, to compete at districts. He is also currently taking guitar lessons. He plays keyboard for the youth band at church. He also plays keyboard/percussion and sings background vocals in his dad's band, "Last Ones First."

Turning Point in My Family History

Today, March 4, 2011, marks the 55th anniversary of a significant event in my personal family history. On that date, my father acknowledged and accepted God’s call to become a preacher. He was almost 30. I was almost 9, the oldest of four (later to become five). His decision on that date was even more dramatic against the backdrop of his life to that point: he had started drinking in high school, and after entering the Army Air Corps in World War II, had become a “hopeless alcoholic” (his words).

Our family in 1954, before Daddy's decision

       

I remember with sadness (and still some tears) those early days of my childhood with an alcoholic father. But I also remember the day, shortly after February 29, 1956, when he came into the kitchen and said to his three daughters and baby son, “How would you kids like to have a preacher for a daddy?” A preacher? Are you kidding? No longer the embarrassing taunts from neighbors’ kids about how they were not allowed to play with us because of our father’s condition (often passed out)? “Yes! I would love it!" I remember answering. I never complained about, and was always thankful for, being a “preacher’s kid.” I had been something else, and I knew the miracle that had happened in our lives.

Daddy had made the choice to turn his life over to God, a poignant story I’ll save for another time, a few days before March 4 (on February 29, 1956). At that time, he had promised God that if He would take away from him the desire to drink, he would do anything God asked. God asked for his service in the ministry.

Our family in Summer 1956

                       

So, Daddy and Mother, and us four kids moved to Arkadelphia, Arkansas, later that same year, for Daddy to attend Ouachita Baptist College, to prepare for ministry. He began preaching wherever he could find the opportunity, and became pastor of his first church while still in college, in August 1956.  Daddy graduated from college in three years, with a major in New Testament Greek and straight A’s on his transcript.

 

From Daddy comes my love of learning

My two sisters and I began singing, first in two-part harmony and then shortly thereafter in three-part harmony, and we sang “special music” a lot of times when Daddy preached. Thus began the important role of music in our lives, that continues to this day, in my siblings and our children and grandchildren.

Other than how my young little life changed dramatically on March 4, 1956, how was that date a turning point in my personal history? Because Daddy followed God’s call to be a preacher, when he finished college, he began looking for a church to pastor in Missouri, where he could continue his studies at a seminary. The church that called Daddy to be their pastor was Pleasant Hill Baptist Church, Jefferson City, Missouri.
 

Pleasant Hill Baptist Church

                    

In that little church there was a wonderful family named Ford. They had four children as well: three boys and a girl. Daddy’s first day as pastor there was June 28, 1959. That evening, after church, I staked my territory (remember, I had two sisters). “The oldest Ford boy is mine,” I said. That was the day I met and fell in love with that stinkin’ cute Russell Ford (he was 14; I was 12). (My sister next to me later fell in love with another of the Ford boys, David, and they got married three years after us.)

The love of my life, 1960

                          

So, because Daddy turned his life over to God, accepted God’s call to be a preacher, followed God’s call to college, to his first pastorate, and then to Pleasant Hill Baptist Church in Missouri, I met the man God had ordained for me. And because of that, we have had a wonderful marriage for 45 years so far, two absolutely wonderful children (Mark and Sharida), and our four wonderful grandchildren (Tory and Conner, Alyssa and Dawson). And how will the story continue? Only God knows. For one thing, Daddy has a grandson in the ministry and a great-grandson who has already accepted God's call to ministry, not to mention other direct descendants and family members who serve God with their entire lives. But, even though we cannot know all the ways the story will continue through the generations, the origin of the story will never change.

I am a thankful child of God—a thankful daughter, sister, wife, mother and grandmother. I’m thankful that God called Daddy. I’m thankful that Daddy was willing to answer. I’m thankful that God allowed me to personally witness the awesome miracle of a changed life. And I’m thankful that the changed life affected history from his time forward. That’s the way it works.

One thing about growing older, you know—you have the special perspective of looking back and actually seeing how God “works all things together.”

Romans 8:28: “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”

How to Pray for Your Children (and Grandchildren)

Some years ago I made these notes in my Bible Study folder. Unfortunately, I did not record the source. I have referred to this on several occasions, and I think it’s worth sharing.

How To Pray For Your Children (COPIED)

• Psalm 63:1; 2 Timothy 3:15--That they will know Christ as Savior early in life
• Psalm 119:67; 71; 75--That they will be caught when guilty
• Psalm 97:10-11; Romans 12:9--That they will have a hatred for sin
• Matthew 6:13; John 17:15; 2 Corinthians 10:5b; 1 Corinthians 6:19; Revelation 12:11--That they will be protected from the evil one in each area of their lives: spirit, soul and body
• Esther 10:3; Daniel 6:3--That they will have a responsible attitude in all their personal relationships
• Proverbs 1:10,11,15; 1 Corinthians 15:33; Proverbs 22:24-25--That they will desire the right kind of friends and be protected from the wrong friends
• That they will respect those in authority over them:

         Parents – Ephesians 6:1-3
         Spiritual leaders – Hebrews 13:17
         Government Officials – Romans 13:1
         Employers – Ephesians 6:5-8

• 2 Corinthians 6:14-17--That they will be kept from the wrong mate and saved for the right one
• 1 Corinthians 6:18-20--That they, as well as those they marry, will be kept pure until marriage
• James 4:7; 1 Peter 5:6-9--That they will learn to totally submit to God and actively resist Satan in all circumstances
• Romans 12:1-2; Matthew 6:33--That they will be single-hearted, willing to be sold out to Jesus Christ
• Hosea 2:6; Ezekiel 22:30--That they will be hedged in so they cannot find their way to wrong people or places and that the wrong people cannot find their way to them

Sharida the Beautiful

This was a fun digital page to do, with such a beautiful subject in the photo--my sweet daughter.

Dawson's "Valentimes" Day

My littlest grandchild lives on the opposite side of the state, so I don't get to see him as often as I would like. He called to tell me about his box he made at his preschool's Mom's Night (and Mom sent me a pic). Then, his mom sent me photos from his Valentine Party. I LOVE Valentine's Day, and I LOVE Dawson, so it was fun to put together this digital scrapbook page!

Love--Seriously

View Full Album

Recently I enjoyed teaching a lesson in Kidz ROC about love—the serious, Christ-like kind of love. We talked about how that kind of love “looks.” Our Bible focus for that lesson was the description of love found in I Corinthians 13, often called The Love Chapter. It presents a challenging picture of what real love is, seriously.

As the children looked up the passage in their Bibles, they were interested to learn that in our wedding, when the photographer wanted to take a picture of our hands on the Bible (my father’s Bible, incidentally--he had performed the marriage ceremony), I realized that picture would be part of my formal records of our wedding, forever. So, I wanted the passage that would be reflected in the picture to be meaningful. I quickly turned to I Corinthians 13. And sure enough, 45 years later, there is the picture to remind me that Christ-like love is at the foundation of our marriage.

We have a special lady in our church who is a wonderful reflection of God’s love. Stef gave us a Valentine gift at church yesterday—a beautiful box of chocolates. The milk and dark chocolate hearts are delicious, but the gift is especially meaningful as the box quotes that ageless verse from I Corinthians:

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Happy Valentine’s Day! Maybe today would be a good day to re-read I Corinthians 13—to better understand about Christ-like LOVE—SERIOUSLY!

Dawson and His "Four-Wheeler"

This event took place last April, when Dawson turned four. I just created the digital scrapbook page today. His party was so cute, and after the party, he wanted to show me how he could ride his "four-wheeler" in his back yard. He is SO CUTE!!!

My GranGirl Alyssa

I am blessed with two beautiful granddaughters, both 17 1/2 (I cannot believe they are both young ladies now). Alyssa lives in a different part of the state from me, and I miss her so much!

My Snow Princess GranGirl

Tory and several other youth from RiverOaks Church went sledding at Forest Park in St. Louis. She is SO beautiful! It was fun to do this quick digital layout to display this cute picture.

Completed 2010—YAY!!

Since “catching up” on all my photos a couple of years ago, and because I have a Hobby Room where I can keep my supplies out all the time, I typically scrapbook  in “real time.” I take A LOT of pictures, as I have a special family, and there are always lots of events that contribute to the affirmation of my scrapbooking hobby!

I just sat down to look through 2010. My goodness, what a beautiful family, and what wonderful memories! In fact, that has become the main reason I love this hobby—it’s not just the process (that I do love), or the product (though I am usually somewhat proud of the completed albums), but it’s the reminders and the memories I have, every single time I look back through an album. And I LOVE that my children and grandchildren seem to enjoy the memory-reminders as well! A warm feeling wells up in my heart when I see them with my scrapbook albums on their laps!

So, now that I’m all caught up and will break from scrapbooking to work on one or two of the other major projects I have in progress, in a few days, I’ll look forward to starting to capture the memories of 2011!

At Home in the Blizzard of 2011

During the historical weather event referred to as the Blizzard of 2011 (Jan 31-Feb 1), the accumulation varied extremely within the same local vicinity, at least in Missouri. While some of Wentzville received about 6 inches, other parts of Wentzville got 10-12. Where we live, between Wentzville and Troy, we measured 14 inches of snow, on top of about an inch of ice. Russell's attempts to scale the driveway were unsuccessful. Our subdivision owner bladed our drive shortly after this effort.

This page is something I put together with digital scrapbooking software, just for fun--my "regular" albums are not digital!

A Sweet Old Lady

When I was around 30 years of age, my pastor made a statement from the pulpit that caught my attention. What he said seemed to me a profound observation, and I purposed in my heart to make it one of my “life philosophies.” What he said was this:

“You young ladies out there—would you like to be a sweet old lady?” [“Yes, I would,” I answered in my mind, anxious to hear his follow-on—perhaps some kind of magical formula—or at least a blueprint to follow? I had seen some bitter, cranky old women, and I did not want to become one.]

He continued, “If you want to be a sweet old lady, be a sweet young lady.”

Now, that IS profound, it IS one of my life philosophies, but it IS NOT easy to live. I recently came across a quote that supports my pastor’s “sermon” from some 30 years ago.  “BE TODAY WHO YOU WANT TO BE TOMORROW." (Amy Carroll) Yes, that’s what I’m saying--be a sweet young lady, if you want to be a sweet old lady.

Earlier this month, my devotional study was about Abigail (I Samuel 25). The point of the devotional piece was how Abigail persevered through an abusive and difficult marriage (to Nabal). As I began to read, I thought, “This is fine, but it doesn’t really apply to me.” Nope, this was not applicable to me personally—thankfully, God has blessed me with the most awesome husband in the world.

Then, as I read the rest of the study, the author, Rachel Olson, described the characteristics of Abigail that make her a wonderful  biblical example for women. THOSE traits ARE applicable to my life.

• She is smart and sensible. (vs. 3)
• People look to her for wisdom and leadership in times of trouble. (vs. 14, 17)
• She is decisive and wastes no time worrying, pitying her situation, or fussing at those who cause her trouble — instead she takes action to improve the situation. (vs. 18, 23)
• She is generous, (vs. 18, 27) even willing to lay down her life for others. (vs. 22, 24
• She is humble (vs. 24, 41) and quick to ask forgiveness. (vs. 28)
• She speaks eloquently and tactfully — with a knowledge of God — as she gives one of the longest speeches by a woman recorded in the Bible. (vs. 24-31) [AHA, says Barbara—long speeches are okay, even lauded!!!!—YAY!—oh, but wait, it also says eloquent, tactful, and with a knowledge of God—okay, more work needed on this one, too.]
• She looks out for the well-being and reputation of others. (vs. 25, 31)
• She trusts God, holds her tongue, and waits patiently for the right timing. (vs. 36-38)

Abigail  has it all — wisdom, character, courage, faith, eloquence, graciousness. She possesses both inner and outer beauty. After Nabal’s death, Abigail married King David, and they had a son. David would have seven other wives in his lifetime, but Rachel Olson writes that only Abigail earned his complete respect. Only she had a positive influence on him.

Wow—so many traits that I desire but do not have…yet…

Back to my “life philosophy” of becoming.  I must start today to emulate the example of Abigail…because she is the kind of woman I want to be tomorrow.

“Teach us to number our days that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12

Impossible Taco Pie

In the early 90’s, a group of recipes "made the rounds" that were dishes made with Bisquick and called “Impossible…whatever.”  They were all good, frankly, and the “impossible” referred to the fact that you would never dream they were made with Bisquick. Out of that era, the recipe that emerged as the “keeper” for my family was this one. Although I show the “serve with” foods on the side, we often put the lettuce, tomatoes, sour cream, and shredded cheese directly on top of the “pie.” This is definitely one of those recipes that tastes better than it seems like it would. We just enjoyed this for supper tonight. We love it!

IMPOSSIBLE TACO PIE

• Brown and drain: 1 pound ground beef and 1/2 c. chopped onion.
• Stir in 1 envelope taco seasoning mix (I use McCormick Original).
• Spread in oblong medium-sized casserole dish, sprayed with Pam.
• Top with 4 oz. can chopped green chilies, drained.
• Beat 1 1/4 c. milk, 3/4 c. Bisquick (I use Heart-Smart Bisquick), and 3 eggs until smooth. Pour on top of meat mixture.
• Bake for 25 minutes at 400 degrees.
• Top with 1 c. (or more) shredded Monterey Jack cheese and shredded cheddar cheese (I use the Mexican Cheese mixture).
• Return to oven until cheese melts.
• Serve with chopped tomatoes, lettuce, more shredded cheeses, and sour cream.
• Freezes well.

Coconut Pineapple Pie

Found this recipe in a magazine, with a note that its original source was an old church cookbook—so I knew it had to be good…it is!!
 

• 1 c sugar
• 3 T all-purpose flour
• 1 c light corn syrup
• 1 c flaked coconut
• 1 can (8 ounces) crushed pineapple, with juice
• 3 eggs, beaten
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 1 unbaked pastry shell (9 inches)-best if homemade!
• ¼ c butter, melted

In a bowl, combine sugar and flour. Add the corn syrup, coconut, pineapple, eggs and vanilla; mix well. Pour into pastry shell. Drizzle with melted butter. Bake at 350 for 50-55 minutes. Cover loosely with foil if the top browns too quickly.

Cool on a wire rack.

Chill before cutting. Store in the refrigerator.

Visiting My Brother's Church

This is a traditional, paper scrapbooking page I did for my regular album. Event took place December 5, I created the scrapbook page in January.

"Chef" Mark

During Kristy's school year, Mark does a lot of the cooking for their family. He brings his creative nature into the kitchen and often makes up delicious recipes. The Asian-style pheasant he prepared for us was amazing.

This is a traditional, paper scrapbooking page for my 2010 album.

My Prayer for 2011-Unsettle Me

Looking back through some of the devotional thoughts that have had special meaning for me during the last couple of years, I came across something that I ear-marked as a “keeper.” It is a prayer written by one of my favorite devotional authors, Lysa TerKeurst. I have adapted and taken ownership of this prayer for myself, for the new year:

UNSETTLE ME.

Unearth that remnant of unforgiveness.
Shake loose that justification for harshness.
Reveal that broken shard of pride.

Unsettle me in the best kind of way. For when I allow Your touch to reach the deepest parts of me, suddenly, a fresh wind of life twists and twirls and dances through my soul.

I can delight in forgiveness and love more deeply.
I can discover my gentle responses and find softer ways for my words to land.
I can recognize the beauty of humility.
I can rest assured that even though harsh winds blow, I will be held by Him.

Goodbye shallow love, sharp words, and self-focus. Welcome deeper love, softer words, unleashed intimacy, and the certainty I am held.

Welcome my unsettled heart.
Welcome 2011.

Family Christmas 2010

One of our many Christmas Traditions is family pictures by the tree. This "required" part of the Christmas Celebration was passed down from my paternal grandparents--even the "who" is to be in each picture: grandparents with grandchildren, and each family grouping.

My Son and His Son: A Christmas Blessing

At our church’s Christmas Eve service, our Pastor/Son Mark sang “Joseph’s Lullaby.” Before he sang, Mark shared that fifteen years ago, at his church’s Christmas Eve service, he (Mark), dressed in full costume as Joseph, sang a similar song, while holding 6-month old Conner as the baby Jesus. “Tonight will be a little different,” said Mark. “Tonight my son will accompany me as I sing.”

What a beautiful presentation of “Joseph’s Lullaby” by my son and my grandson, who are constant blessings in my life.

Merry Christmas!

Common Courtesy: Only for Christmas Past?

I admit to my age...I’m 63. That means a lot of things (for another blog piece, at another time). But among those things is the fact that I have seen a lot of changes during my years. I hope I will have the opportunity to see a lot more things change. I try to keep up, I really do. For the most part, I think I do well in that department. I was one of the first in our small town to get a personal computer, to get email, to get a laptop, and so on. I have a digital camera, a DVR and an iPhone. I have a blog, for goodness sake. I have embraced the trend to communicate more electronically and less with pen and paper. But, recently I have been thinking about things that have changed that are NOT for the better. And that leads me to believe, in those cases, that some things should not be allowed to become “of the past.” I want to give thought to that—because I want to be part of teaching my grandchildren the value of some things that have had a tendency to become NOT valued…things that should STILL be considered common courtesy. I think most would agree, if time is taken to give consideration to these thoughts.

Take “manners,” for example. What is considered “good manners” has changed, and some of the change is simply the passing of time, and the fact that some of the “old” actions considered to be “bad manners” were just silly. In my grandfather’s house, we were not allowed to sing at the table, or to laugh at the table. It was like the quickest way to get in big trouble (always a challenge for my sister and me, for whom almost anything could trigger fits of giggles). He required that orange juice be finished before eating breakfast. Those were silly requirements that never did make sense. Things that he considered “common courtesy” didn’t stand the test of time.

Not that long ago, it was considered “poor manners” for a guy to wear a cap indoors. Some of the “older” folks might still have a problem with that. But, when you come down to it, what was the reason for that “rule of etiquette”? Again, it really didn’t stand the test of time, and today, very few people would have a problem with it.

I could go on with a list of things that were considered rude or discourteous a long time ago but are no longer viewed in that light. I could also generate a list of “today’s” no-no’s  that we could predict might not stand the test of time.

But, my soapbox today is about something that should never become a thing of the past, and that is taking the time to respond with appreciation when something personal and special is done for you. Here’s my case in point, during this Christmas season: When someone gives you a gift, whether it’s tiny or huge, an acknowledgement (and frankly, a thank-you) is warranted. When someone sends you (especially through old-fashioned snail mail) a personal invitation to an event, a response is required (and frankly, deserved)—whether or not “RSVP” is written on the invitation.

The irony in all this to me is that MORE seems to be LESS when in comes to communication. Most of us use multiple modalities these days (facebook, email, texting, cell phones). With these MORE ways to communicate seems to have come LESS meaningful communication in many ways (another thought for a later blog piece). But, it is sad to me that people have all those ways to communicate, and they can’t even use one of those ways to thank their grandmother for a Christmas gift (most grandmothers do have those ways of receiving communication, you know—and if they don’t, there is still such a thing as writing a note, addressing it, stamping and mailing it—probably the method she used to send you that check!). Just use one of those modalities that you already use, and send a quick thanks, for goodness sake.

The same is true for personal invitations. If someone takes the time to personally invite you to an event, it is extremely rude and disrespectful not to even acknowledge receiving the invitation. We facebook and text constantly, mostly about meaningless things (I include myself in this). Common courtesy, when it comes to showing appreciation and being respectful, should not be overlooked. I cannot even think of a good excuse. You can respond these days without even needing to buy a stamp. C’mon.

I see this sad trend happening in the generation of my children. I’m sad to think that the children of that generation may never even realize the value of showing appreciation. And, if the trend continues, that also means they will never experience the joy of being on the receiving end of expressions of appreciation. And, that’s a blessed place to be. So, I’ll stay on my soapbox and pray that this kind of common courtesy does not become a thing of the past.

My Brother, His Daughter and Grandson

Caught up with holiday preparations, spent a little time today scrapbooking (traditional, paper). My brother recently visited his daughter and grandson in Colorado, and the whole family is so doggone photogenic, I just had to do a scrapbook page with these gorgeous photos!

Our Christmas Snack Buffet

Most of our snack recipes are traditional, some having been served during our holiday season each year, for more than 40 years. We usually try a couple of new recipes each year. This year, Paula Deen's "Caramelized Bacon and Fancy Nut Mix" and her "Puffy Cheese Pastries" made the cut. We'll see how they do when we vote on "keepers."

Grandson's Solo in HS Winter Concert

Fun digital layout, using FotoFusion software.

Lifelong Christmas Wish

I am so blessed. There are truly not very many things, at this stage of my life, about which I can say, “I have always wanted, but never had…..” What evidence of a blessed life! My goodness.

Still, I guess it’s the “little girl” in me, or maybe the “big girl,” or, okay, I’ll say it, the “old girl"—that has always wanted, but never had, Christmas lights on my house.

This year, my husband made it happen. After 45 years of marriage, I have lights on my house at Christmas, for the first time! And let me say that they needed to be multi-colored lights—the kind that used to be on my Christmas trees. I have three trees in my house now, but they all have white/clear lights. I needed to see the colors of “real” Christmas lights.

My husband says that his greatest joy in life is taking care of me. I say that my greatest joy in life is being taken care of by him. Just kidding, on the previous sentence. Sort of. But, really, I feel very special that he granted this Christmas wish for me this year.

Oh, but of course I am spoiled. I know that. But, for me, for today, that’s okay, I think. And, I choose to think of it more as being “blessed."  And that I am.

Our Thanksgiving

“Connecting the Dots”

The longer I live, the more I love learning a new truth, or perhaps a reminder of an old truth from a fresh perspective. This week’s Bible study (in our small group) brought such a “new” understanding, and it landed in my lap with a “ker-plop!”

WISDOM…it’s one of my life-goals. I want to have wisdom. I want to be thought of as being wise. I want to be remembered by my children and grandchildren as one who possessed wisdom. I desire that to be part of my legacy.

My mind’s understanding of the meaning of  wisdom is what I “pictured” as I prayed for wisdom for myself, and for others who are close to me. Wisdom meant “more than just knowledge,” or “knowledge plus experience,” or “knowing the right thing to do,” or perhaps “a ‘smartness’ developed through years of experience.” Sometimes I think I defined it as “spiritual understanding.” Maybe I even thought that wisdom was wrapped up in “finding the appropriate words” for a given situation. I had an understanding of wisdom, and according to my own criteria, I thought I had a handle on at least “becoming” wise.

Erwin McManus, in Uprising: a Revolution of the Soul, indeed provided for me a fresh perspective on what wisdom TRULY is, according to God’s Word. Erwin writes, “…wisdom is more than just finding the appropriate words but having the words that bring healing and life. [italics mine] Wisdom is not just knowing what to say; it is also sensing the situation and appropriately responding with life-giving words and actions.”

Okay, that was the “ker-plop” for me. Oh, I have the words. I always have words. I have even been labeled  “linguistically gifted” (what does that mean anyway?). So, finding words has never been a problem for me. They come, fast and furiously, even more so if under pressure. I become linguistically brilliant. You don’t even want to get in a verbal argument with me. But, of course that is not what wisdom is about, now is it?

Isaiah 50:4-7 is a passage that McManus quotes as a description of the characteristics of wisdom. I’ve read that passage many times; I never made that link before (fresh perspective). Quoting verse 4, from the NIV:

The Sovereign Lord has given me an instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary. He wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to listen like one being taught.

Two characteristics of wisdom that are described here: knowing and using words to SUSTAIN THE WEARY, and then also LISTENING. Words—knowing not only what to say, but when and how to say it. Words—knowing when not to speak them at all, but rather to listen (sometimes to another person, always to God).

Fit those two concepts into your “linguistic giftedness,” Ms Barbara!!!

Finally, and I think I’ve always known this in my heart, but it was refreshing and affirming to hear McManus describe this aspect of wisdom--

A part of wisdom is simply being able to connect the dots between your present actions and the future reaction, what you sow is what you reap. Often times we make decisions that seem great at the moment but turn out to be different in time.

Part of wisdom is being able to see and understand the future consequences of present actions. Humanly, we are not always able to do this. Sometimes we make a good faith decision that simply doesn’t turn out the way we had thought it would. Some things, however, CAN be predicted. Wisdom is being able to foresee those consequences and make decisions in the present based on that understanding.

This plays into my “Decisions-in-Advance” sermon I preach to my grandchildren. There are some temptations that will come your way that you ALREADY KNOW will not turn out for your good. Taking an extreme example, recreational drugs. You already know the end of that story. (This same philosophy can be applied to any physical addition, by the way.) It may seem the “cool” thing to do at the time. But, if you have already decided ahead of time, that you will not give in to that temptation, it’s so much easier at the time. The decision was already made, and all you have to do then is stick to the decision. I’m not saying it is easy, but it is certainly easier than waiting until the moment and THEN making the decision and sticking with it. Decision already made. Just implement it. That “decision-in-advance” is an example of true, Biblical wisdom, because you have connected the dots between present action and future consequence.

I can attest to this in my own life—at least in that area, I can say God blessed me with a measure of wisdom. I have always been able to think in terms of future consequences (perhaps being the child of an alcoholic has given me a deeper perspective than some). Additionally, a young mom in our small group discussion shared that it was interesting to hear me talk about “decisions-in-advance,” because her own mom had preached that sermon to her, and as she was growing up, she took pride in sticking with her decisions, in the area of drug temptations as an example, and she knows God blessed her through that decision.

So, after this study with McManus, when I pray for wisdom for myself and for my family, it is with a more profound understanding of what wisdom really is. From the study leader guide, “God says that if we lack wisdom (and we certainly do), if we’ll ask Him, He will give us the wisdom we desire…God says that we are to ask for wisdom from a heart that is already convinced that God is who He says he is” (James 1:5-8). Another great lesson: pray for wisdom out of a heart that knows that God is God, and I am NOT.

Perhaps this lesson hit me especially hard because I recently allowed fear and worry to cause me to use words in a way that would be the opposite of “sustaining the weary.” The issue was one close to my heart, and I allowed my firmness in the belief that I was “right” outweigh the wisdom that would have dictated a different way of approaching the issue.  In that experience, I didn’t do a very good job of “connecting the dots,” either. I didn’t foresee the consequences of my actions. Unwise again. Because God is good, fortunately, the person whom I treated unwisely was willing to forgive me.

This study didn’t just “step on my toes.” It steam-rolled over me. It left me with the realization that I have so much more to learn about wisdom, and I have so far to go in reaching that goal. But I will continue to pray for wisdom, from a heart that knows that He is God, and I then must believe that He will give it to me, even if He has to hit me over the head with it.  (James 1:5)

Thanksgiving Menu Sneak Preview

I’m having fun experimenting with digital scrapbooking. I’m not ready to replace my traditional method for my real scrapbooks, but it is fun to create a single-page layout sometimes. This is an 8.5 x 11 inch layout, prepared for printing, so that I can keep the tradition of posting the menu in the kitchen on Thanksgiving Day. I've been doing this for years, with a standard computer print-out. The kids all look for the posted menu, immediately after arrival on Thanksgiving Day. The Thanksgiving Menu is traditional and rarely varies, but they still want to see it "in writing!" Thanksgiving is the holiday that I get to most enjoy being a cook and a hostess, as it’s all about the "feast and family" that day, as we celebrate God's bounty and thank Him for our many, many blessings.

Autumn Respite

Conner’s District Honor Choir Concert

We are proud of Grandson Conner (9th grade), as he represented his high school in the 9th-10th Grade District Honor Choir. They performed in concert at Lindenwood College on November 6, and it was our pleasure to be able to attend. As Mark noted, he (Mark) did not have the opportunity to study and perform this level of music until he was in college.

Special Evening/Overnight with Sib's and Spou's

Family-together-times are the BEST TIMES!

My first real attempt at digital scrapbooking...

Sharida's Easy Pumpkin Spice Muffins